My Existence

“I will never know, cause you will never show…”

This is a part of a lyric of a song written and performed by The Cardigans. One interesting things about this phrase is how meaningful information for someone, either it is shown implicitly or explicitly. Without notice, nobody would ever know the existence of a thing (let’s say the information mass rally of 100 days shortcoming program of the government for 2009-2014 period). A person may search, look for information, but with no supply or showing all leads to nothing.

This underlined the essence of the lyric above in my own perception. If you showed me nothing, i would not know whether your feelings exist or not. Thank god i have heard and kept what you have told me, though it was rather implicit. I didn’t really think about it until now, i read one of your post which saying that it was your wishes for 2010 ahead (I’d say that because it was made on early December of 2009).

Apparently, it sounded rather sad even to me. Yet i know it’s something that could happen to anyone on this living earth. However ironic it is to me, this could not keep me away from thinking, what the meaning of my existence to some people? How am i doing for them? Looking back i remembered that my life wouldn’t be this way without ‘them’. More or less, they have changed my point of view, my personality, how i thought of things, how i act or react, and so on. Yes, they meant a lot to me from their way sharing experience of life with me, be it short or a long moment.

Now i am currently reminiscing of what good deeds have i done. Have i done anything that affected them in a good manner? Have i brought an optimism to their life? Have i taught them new perspective about how to see life as it is? About how to put themselves in others shoes? It has been 23 years of life i am living. Not so much achievement i made during this breathing lungs and pumping heart of human life. They may not showing or telling or writing anything about how was my existence for them. Nevertheless, I do really hope that my existence would mean something to them. It would be my own personal achievement…though not so great…

One thought on “My Existence

  1. Hahah, not sure that this will mean anything, but your existence means that I have a friend who occasionally scolded me, occasionally be my driver, occasionally reminded me that I have to be logical, occasionally is there to talk about music and some issues, and occasionally helped me to see another view of things.

    Though we tend to be busy with our own businesses and random activities and not really keep in touch that often, I think of you as a nice friend.

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